16 Aug 1987

Hey, there, Udo!–

You outsmarted yourself. That ribbon-inking information I sent was a sly trick to get you to describe your own. I have now taken out a patent on yours, and the money should roll in…at least $1.35 in royalties every quarter. This should be a lesson to you: don’t give away highly original ideas. Even Earl Howser can’t help you at this point. (He’s in jail, anyway.)

InfoWorld is not free but it’s cheap. I enclose the address for subscribing. Ignore that “$100 a year” stuff. Write to them for subscription rates. I don’t pay anything near $100 a year. Less than half. If you wait a while after they send you the subscription information, you will receive offers to subscribe for less. When they drop to $1.35 a quarter, jump in. It’s a weekly that’s bursting with all kinds of computer gee-whiz that I don’t understand and don’t plan to learn. I’m happy with my IBM clone and WordPerfect program. All I need is a ribbon inker.

ENCLOSED is a review of the Santa Fe Opera season, which I foward because it mentions da Ponte, the character John played in whatever they were putting on (it was not clear to me). But now we know for sure just who da Ponte was and what he did. We can never be sure about John. Affixed to the bottom, right, is a proof of a photo of us. As soon as we get it–or some other suitable photo–in the proper size, we will send it to you. In the meantime, SEND NO MONEY!

This has to be short because we have members of the family here–the geology faction–and there are things to do that I cannot avoid…like work. And stepdaughter and husband and 3 totties are returning tonight from a week in Southern California (took the totties to Disneyland, Sea World, etc.). Mary is out shopping for groceries so they won’t face empty shelves.

We can’t drop in at the Stamford estate when you take title, but would you like us to write to all the people we knew in Franklin and Oneonta 50 years ago, and tell them to drop in? A little housewarming party. Take your mind off buffer solutions.

The following is self-explanatory:

When Thomas is out with his telescope,
His playmates all pout in a jealous mope.
But Tom will alert us,
So Martians won’t hurt us.
He gives all the rest of us fellows hope.

–Fred C(opernicus) Dobbs

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