Diary

The Doctors Laughed At My Body

October 27, 2022

The doctor and his assistant looked at my body and they laughed. They said they had never seen anything like it before, but that’s because it is a rarity. It is a rarity to be born with internal female reproductive organs, while also having genitalia that would typically be considered that of a male.

The doctor was primarily interested in examining my breasts and my genitalia. Most doctors I’ve seen have historically approached their exams and questions in similar fashion. The doctor barely listened to my concerns, let alone how I identified from a gender standpoint. He was just looking to see if I had a vagina, but he didn’t find one. When he saw my penis, he laughed and said, “it looks like you are transgender”.

“I’m not transgender; I have XX chromosomes and identify as female; I always have”, I said.

The doctors laughed at my body. When I was born, the doctors weren’t sure of my birth sex. My parents named me Thomas, and simply raised as a girl. Now that I’m older, I identify as a woman. What does it matter what’s between my legs? Am I not still me? Why should you care about this small part of me if you don’t even care about me as a person?

The doctor told me, “in that case you are a cisgender female”.

I knew full well what that meant, but it didn’t mean much to me other than confirming that I had been assigned female/intersex at birth, at least from a genetic standpoint. The doctor’s laughter rang in my ears as he said those words. I could tell by the way he looked at me that he refused to believe someone could be born as an intersex female, while also being cisgender.

To my doctor, I am an anomaly. To me, I am just myself; different, not wrong or imperfect.

Reference: My doctor visit on March 11, 2022.
Inspiration: to whom it may concern.

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