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2022 In Review
I started posting monthly selfies, starting in January of 2022. Here are all my selfies from 2022…
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The Doctors Laughed At My Body
October 27, 2022 The doctor and his assistant looked at my body and they laughed. They said they had never seen anything like it before, but that’s because it is a rarity. It is a rarity to be born with internal female reproductive organs, while also having genitalia that would typically be considered that of a male. The doctor was primarily interested in examining my breasts and my genitalia. Most doctors I’ve seen have historically approached their exams and questions in similar fashion. The doctor barely listened to my concerns, let alone how I identified from a gender standpoint. He was just looking to see if I had a vagina,…
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The Art Of Saying Goodbye
It’s an awkward feeling – the one you get when you have to say goodbye to someone you don’t want to let go of, be it a friend, colleague, or loved one. If you do not understand the art of saying goodbye, your relationships are bound to suffer. There’s nothing more important than solid relationships in this world if you want to succeed in life. I defied my parents’ wishes and dropped out of college. I was extremely intelligent, but struggled within the modern educational system. Regardless, my parents expected me to pursue an academic degree. I was adamant about not going back. I knew that there was more for…
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From Ties That Bind To Freedom: How I Escaped The Cycle Of Codependency
For many years, I lived in a constant fear of being abandoned by the people around me, so I did everything in my power to keep them happy and close by me. That strategy worked fine until the day I found myself standing all alone without anyone else to turn to. My earliest memories are of chaos. Chaos both at home and school, one seeming not to escape the other. It’s because of this that I made sure as soon as I had the means, I would turn and run away. But, I could never get away from the broken ties of ropes left over from the circus of our…
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I Have Wasted An Entire Year Of My Life
August 27, 2022 I have wasted an entire year of my life trying to get medical care and surgery for being born a hermaphrodite. The doctors have wasted my time and money, and forced me to postpone my life by making empty promises that I will receive life-sustaining medical care based on the contingency and bias of arbitrary check boxes. Today was my ultimate breaking point. I was told by someone that although I am successful and highly skilled at what I do, in order to be truly successful in life, I need to abandon all that I do and spend all my waking hours interacting with random strangers on…
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I’ve Lived A Life Less Ordinary
Today is the day that I’ve decided to write down all the things I’ve been holding back my entire life. Now is the time for me to finally write about black forests and wolves, the monster under my bed. This is my time, blessed, reverent, I understand. I was born intersex; for the first few years of my life, doctors weren’t sure of my birth gender. My parents decided to name me Thomas, and as I grew, I was effectively raised as a girl, which would have been my choice if I had been asked. Although I attended pre-school as a girl, my father insisted on enrolling me in grade…
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Closer To Fine By The Indigo Girls Reminds Me Of My Own Life
I first heard Closer To Fine by The Indigo Girls when I was 16 and since then, it has always had personal meaning to me. Whether I’m feeling overwhelmed or going through something difficult, this song seems to remind me of how important it is to remember that you are never truly alone. Closer to Fine is a song that I’ve heard a hundred times, yet I never fully paid attention to its lyrics. It was written by two incredible musicians named Amy Ray and Emily Saliers of The Indigo Girls. As they sing in harmony, they make me feel like my experiences are relatable—like I’m not alone. They remind…
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The Pride Blogger Tag
This tag originated on Indiecator; I found out about this tag from a blog I follow called A Geek Girls Guide. Where are you from? What’s your name, age, etc.? Introduce yourself!I am Thomas Slatin (nice to meet you!) I was born and raised in New York, but have moved to Vermont, and plan to live here for the rest of my life. You can read a lot more about me here. What are your pronouns?My pronouns are She/Her/Hers. How do you feel about pronouns? Have you preferred different ones in the past?I have always preferred She/Her/Hers my entire life. What’s your sexuality?I am a cisgender female, and a lesbian.…
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The Gender Binary is an Unnecessary Construct
If you’re unfamiliar with the gender binary, it refers to the idea that there are only two genders and everyone falls into one of those two categories (male or female). It’s an idea that causes unnecessary strife in our society. While the concept is nothing new—people have believed in the gender binary since before we had scientific evidence to support it—it’s still not one without consequences or negative effects on people who don’t conform to it. Luckily, we have generations of scientists and forward-thinking humans who are working hard to dismantle this concept in every aspect of their lives. There are more than two genders and they can be hard…
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What It’s Like To Be Born With Female Pseudohermaphroditism
My name is Thomas, and I was born with a condition called female pseudohermaphroditism. My condition means that while I was born with normal-looking male genitals, I also had a functioning female set of internal reproductive organs. After a doctor encouraged me to intentionally cause myself harm because, as they were concerned, “people like you should not exist”, I decided to write this article to educate, inspire, and inform those who are curious about my intersex condition. This condition is what caused my external genitals looked more like those of a boy than those of a girl. However, it wasn’t until I got my period as an adolescent that I…
